Loving Enemies

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A clip from Steve Goodier, of '3 Minute Learning':

SO YOU HAVE ENEMIES?

A knight returned to his castle at twilight. He was a mess. His armor was dented, his helmet askew, his face was bloody, his horse was limping and he listed to one side in the saddle. His lord met him at the gate, asking, "What has befallen you, Sir Knight?"

Straightening himself up as best he could, he replied, "Oh, Sire, I have been laboring in your service, robbing and burning and pillaging your enemies to the west."

"You have been what?" cried the startled nobleman. "But I haven't any enemies to the west!"

"Oh!" said the knight. And then, after a pause, "Well, I think you do now."

What about you? Enemies to the west? Or the north, the south or the east? None of us will calmly sail through our lives in perfect harmony with everyone we meet. And though most conflict can be resolved along the way, and most of our bruised relationships can eventually be healed, some passionate issues may threaten to drive a permanent wedge between people. Heartfelt moral and political stances, especially, can polarize folks who just as passionately hold differing positions. Former U.S. Ambassador Claire Booth Luce once observed: "I don't have a warm personal enemy left. They've all died off. I miss them terribly because they helped define me."

So-called "enemies" can serve a valuable purpose. If we let them, they can teach us about ourselves. By holding a mirror before us, they can help us see what we may have missed. By disagreeing with our heartfelt convictions, they can sharpen our points of view. And, if we allow it, they can unwittingly help us practice strength and compassion in the face of criticism.

If enemies cannot become friends, they can become teachers. If we listen, they will teach us what our friends cannot.

Amen!

My main spiritual teacher used to talk about relating to our enemies, and I resisted. I thought, "if I have enemies, I am doing something wrong." Now, fortunately and sadly, I know differently. Sometimes they 'just comes.' One time Michael ordered breakfast in the South. When it arrived, he asked about the grits. "Honey, you don't order grits, they 'just comes.' And so do enemies, and it helps if I name it and accept the reality of it.

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Life is complicated. I have found that sometimes:
* I love those whom I hate, and I hate those whom I love.
* My friends become enemies, and my enemies become friends.
* My friends Act like enemies, and my enemies Act like friends.
The game is pretty complex... and life is long, roles change.

I have found, for many reasons more than are quickly covered in this post, the dance of enemies is a blessing (often uncomfortable), as well as a fantastic opportunity for healing and learning!

Hope you are enjoying your dance!!