Weebles wobble, but they don't stay down

I spent a lot of my adult life in depression,
or with big gnarly melancholy dominating my life on a regular basis.
Since I started my current soul work, that is all a memory.

I still go through Intense stuff, no worries!
But the challenges are from my real life, now, and handle-able.

More often and more uncomfortable 

is the stuff I am 'clearing' that feels rotten in my space.

But I Know and, by the use of my inner-tools, I ensure
that yuckiness is merely on its way up and out of my system.

The garbage truck is full of sound and fury,
sometimes it smells awful, and it is a really bad place to have a picnic! 
But unless I block/resist it, 

soon it is GONE, carrying all my rotten stuff along with it ; )

Again, this wasn't always the case!
For most of my life, all the crap was just Happening To Me! 

- ahhh - 

and I couldn't make it stop.

But for over a decade, I stand in a different place than I used to stand 

- this has made everything different:

I Know:
- the overwhelming emotions,
- the grinding thought patterns,
- the habits like Victim and Shy, and
- the set-points on 'low power' and 'give everything I can to others and not myself'…
no longer Dominate me, if I don't choose for them to do so.

I have experienced over and over:
I am a weeble: I wobble but I don't stay down ; )
I bounce right back up, in a minute, an hour, a day...

If it takes me longer to get up, I usually need a hand!
I Ask one of my healer friends to assist me to shift, or to hold my hand while I face my demons...
When I am Ready to Get Up, all I have to do is Ask and Receive!

This shift to Choosing My Inner Experience didn't happen because I am smart, or strong, or tenacious. 
I am blessed with those qualities, but that didn't help me for decades.

What helped me is learning and using Inner Tools, that give me leverage in my inner choices
AND learning and applying a few Distinctions (ways of seeing myself and the world) that serve me much better than my old belief-patterns.

I KNOW this soul process works when you work it.
I have seen it for myself and in so many others.

Blessings on your unique journey, Wendy

I happened to write about some of my beliefs and experience, yesterday.  I was encouraging a friend who was facing his own inner demons.  If you would like, read more here.

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Finding Balance: let the waves come, let them go

I allow balance to come to me:
Balance happens
when I do not attach to being perfectly balanced,
and I let go of fighting to stay balanced.

It is only fighting the waves that keeps me out of balance:
When I let go, I slosh back and forth for awhile;
but roaring waves rather quickly settle to ripples,
when I allow them to resolve naturally.

I allow balance to come to me,
when I let go of judging, of attaching to, of resisting
the waves of intensity, of dichotomies, of extremes that pull me off center;
I settle into a dynamic centeredness.

It is only fighting the waves that keeps me out of balance!
As I practice letting go,
I find myself comfortably floating,
swaying around center,

I allow balance to come to me.
It is only fighting the waves that keeps me out of balance.
This is a picture, a practice I received from Lao Tzu.
I have profited from his insight, for awhile now.

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and associated post with Lao Tzu:
Mountains are not better than valleys. Valleys are not better than mountains.

the Power of Acceptance

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"

It's difficult to try to be what you are not. 

Being what you are doesn't require any effort. 

When you become wise, you accept yourself the way you are, 

and the complete acceptance of yourself 

becomes the complete acceptance of everyone else.

"
- don Miguel Ruiz

some will say

"accepting unacceptable things about either oneself or the people you interact with is not always a good notion"

On the physical level, what you say makes sense, and many of us are trained to believe such things.

I have found it does not work. 

I have found that I can, and others can, tweak the outside, try harder for limited periods of time, etc. 

But I have found this method doesn't work for me on the inside, or in the long run, or for anything that is a Core issue for me.

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From my experience:

Unless I can BE with what is 

Unless I can stop Resisting 

Nothing Changes 

IF I really do choose change, 

It serves me to let go, accept what IS. 

then 

Say 'hello' deep inside, and attend to that.

Allow the shifts to flower from within.

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Some will say: 

"we are responsible for the people we become"

"Honesty in looking at ourselves and realizing that if we are less than we choose to be"

"it is within our power to become the best we can be"

"we are not "stuck" with ourselves" 

AMEN

The question is HOW? 

IN what Context?

Through what Process.

It is obvious that one can change the facade, paint the walls, and change the curtains easily enough. 

In my spiritual tradition, we find that Effort works on the physical, but not on the spiritual level. 

I have found to truly realign the foundation and change the structure of my being, it takes a New way of BEing.

Of course, many people don't believe we CAN realign the foundation and change the structure of our being, 

so the process of acceptance/non-judgment and ease/no-effort may seem superfluous 

- but I don't believe so...

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Allowing Ease, not Effort
Finding Freedom from Judgment
What We Resist, Persists...

Is a fruitful journey.

For me, 

- Beating myself (and others) up for where I am. 

- Eschewing what is Real.

- Effort & Striving ... merely looking the part...

Works Not At ALL :)

Acceptance, etc 

actually Does Work, in my experience!

For myself and with others. 

Sometimes the mere release of my judgment and resistance 

and things miraculously shift. 

After all, I am HOLDING in place with my NO!

Some say:

Acceptance Produces Change.

It makes sense, because 

Acceptance removes One of the Forces in Play

after that, shift happens, finding a New Balance. 

So, I just get to keep practicing Acceptance 

- a Powerful blessing of: Truth and Miracles

Being with what IS. 

Releasing the judgment and resistance. 

Easier said than done - and the fruit is Delicious!

: )Wendy 

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Letting Go of Controlling Others

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Something that is very misunderstood in our society, IMOe:
There are body feelings /emotions -> body communication,
as opposed to the spiritual feelings/soul expereince you are vibrating at -> spiritual communication.

I believe Abraham is unclear about this distinction, which leads to confusion and unhappiness, IMOe.
Please keep this distinction in mind, as you understand and integrate the wisdom below:

"
A belief that the behavior of others must be controlled
— so that your observation of that good behavior will make you feel good —
leaves you feeling vulnerable to their behavior.

We would like to help you to understand that
neither the good feeling you find when you observe wanted behavior,
nor the bad feeling you find when you observe unwanted behavior,
is actually the reason that you feel good or bad.

The way you feel is only ever about
your alignment, or misalignment, with the Source within you.
It is only your relationship with the Source within you
that is the reason for the emotions that you feel.

While it is nice to find things in your physical environment
that enhance your good-feeling;
alignment with your Inner Being,
your understanding of why you feel good,
will make it possible for you to feel good regardless of the behavior of others.

Understanding that the way you feel is really about
your Vibrational Relationship with your Inner Being — with the Source within you...
gives you complete empowerment and absolute freedom.
"

- Abraham-Hicks (WRW added white-space)

Mountains are not better than valleys. Valleys are not better than mountains.

I have been getting schooled in some things the last couple weeks - the main message of which, I keep getting as:

Mountains are not better than valleys. Valleys are not better than mountains.

Which is the picture and words for the general concept:

dichotomies, or opposites - just Are in this reality, and are not (on a spiritual level) to be set in competition (including judgment) with each other. Mountains and valleys each just Are.

I may Prefer one thing to another at a particular time/space, but in and of itself on a spiritual level -

left is not better than right

fat is not better than thin

old is not better than young

rich is not better than poor

death is not better than birth

war is not better than peace

you probably get the idea...

(Of course, spiritually, one becomes more or less beneficial for me the moment Gd says - 'go left', or 'sell all you have and follow me'. I am bringing this up to be clear, but this is an aside from what I am learning right now...)

In context, a couple weeks ago, Gd started me working with Jesus on a Big healing project - basically integrating 2 large ‘bags of energy’ = basically 'lost parts' of myself. (one bag can be called ‘shadow stuff’; one could say the other bag is a ‘male’ counterpart to myself).

This full integration will probably take about a year, but the perception of change within (and outside me a bit) is palpable. The enjoyable part has been that I feel increasing more whole – remarkably so – like Swiss cheese getting filled in. Or like I was filled with billiard balls and now all the spaces are getting filled with sand – it is bizarre! The interesting part is learning to ride the wave of different emotions and ‘ways of being’ that are surfacing, that I haven’t had to ‘handle’ consciously as I am now – like male aggression! The challenging part energetically is – there are many reasons why I separated these parts of myself (beliefs, experiences, limits, lies, judgments, etc). So, predictably, as I reintegrate these ‘lost parts’, it is intense and stirs up many things that I need to allow Gd to wash away, if I am to keep going and not pop / die / go insane - whatever!

So Jesus has encouraged me to work with Lao Tse (yeah, the ~4–6th century BCE Chinese Philosopher, founder of Taoism, who the wrote Daodejing)

Lao Tse has been extraordinary in assisting me to let go of the many things that cause me to be ‘bent’ and reject my *self* – things like judgment, etc. These issues caused me to separate myself from myself. And now, these issues are in the way of re-integration…

Lao Tse has been assisting me SO Much with these changes. And with helping me to open to receiving energy from Gd that helps me to release judgment etc, allow more balance, and continually let go. I have been calling the energy equanimity, which is probably accurate, but doesn’t feel big enough. I have found reading a definition of ‘Pu’ (a major concept in the Daodejing) feels like it may be a more well-rounded description of the energy I am receiving from Gd, and foundationally what I am learning from Lao Tse (I have some stuff below on Pu if you are interested)

Anyway my picture for this learning of non-judgment and balance is – The mountain and the valley next to each other – juxtaposed – with no prejudice, no preconceptions, no better-ness between them…


Pu

lit. "uncut wood"

translated "uncarved block", "unhewn log", or "simplicity".

represents a state of receptiveness, child-likeness.

Pu is a symbol for a state of pure potential and perception without prejudice.

In this state, Taoists believe everything is seen as it is, without preconceptions or illusion.

unburdened by knowledge or experiences.

no right or wrong, beautiful or ugly.

only pure experience, or awareness, free from learned labels and definitions.

It is this state of being that is the goal of following wu wei.

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an associated post, with Lao Tzu: Finding Balance: let the waves come, let them go